Post PTIII paper - damaged.

You stayed up until it's two in the morning. Or maybe you just stayed till idk maybe three because you didn't even check the clock while revising. Then the brain couldn't have enough time for memory consolidation. You're too exhausted, the short-term memory in the hippocampus is fading. Why? Because there's no repetition. 

Try the deal - pre-read, read details and reread. 
Failed. 

Everything I read seems to be locked inside but when I see the questions, I have no idea what I just read a couple of days ago. Checked the notes, (mengucap panjang) syukur ada lah juga ilmu fissudur yang Allah tolong. itupun Allah tolong. 
Guessing. Its like throwing darts to target but the target is in clouds. Unbearable to be seen in naked eyes. in other words, 
You have no idea about what you're guessing about.

Then nak kerja yang melibatkan people's life? 
Gila. Cuba lah, cuba. belajar kerana ilmu.
Cuba, belajar sebab minat nak tahu.
Cuba, belajar untuk membantu. 


Berkat ke tak berkat sebenarnya benda yang kau baca? 
Banyak dosa tapi segan nak bangun malam, segan nak doa panjang-pajang. 
Padahal yang memberi cahaya ilmu itu - Dia. 
Takkan tak boleh fikir yang segala ilmu itu patut balik ke Dia juga? 
Habis tu hafal babi buta. Faham ke? Ingat ke?

Tak, ayat tak sedap. Sebab penat sangat. Sebab marah sangat. Sebab fucked up. 
Bukan sebab lain, sebab salah sendiri juga. 

Selalu. resolution yang takkan pernah terbuat sampai lah graduation. 
"taknak study last minute" 

Till now, everything at the eleventh hour. 

Regards,
Tin Kosong.

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